- Waiting for the Inevitable -
This few weeks, i cant shake this feeling of fear off of me, each time i take a look at her and the other person i cant help but feel that i am losing her. i hate to say this, but i dont want to lose her, but it seems that perhaps i will eventually. God has been good all this time, the talks we had on msn, the phone messages were things that he had given to me. But each time, i think abt it, i feel there is something wrong abt it. I love her, but my mind is either playing tricks or its the actual fact rite in front of me, i dont want it to happen. i want a miracle from God this time round.
The nightmare i had a few night back, its killing me from deep within. i am so afraid. So afraid that i cant sleep at night, i am so afraid that i will continue to have similar dreams to it. All i am hoping is that she sees me and i hope that there is a slight chance of a possible relationship. I know that its never easy for a person like me, to fall in love. But i choose to hold on, knowing that it will kill me slowly. I dont want my heart to be crushed once again. i cant afford it to be crushed once again.
So God, will you give me signs of hope tat believing in you, something good will turn out for me and her. I feel that she is indeed special. i am willing to sacrifice alot for her. i just hope to see her smile. i hope she does well in life but the thing is, i hope that the person who is there to hold her and share all this joy of success will be me. So God, show me signs that wat i am doing is right.
I dont wan to lose her. So God, pls. I am asking for a miracle for me to be there for her. To be that guy to hold her and love her. I would like my happy ending now. And if it does happen God, i promise to declare to her and the whole world of your greatness. But pls God, dont let wat i fear most happen. it will surely crushed me...
